About...
I tell my story because at the peak of my mental injury in February 2013, I reached such depths of darkness, that I know why people take their lives and I do not ever want you to know what that is like.
My primary aim is to support, or even challenge your thinking and influence you or your group/team to live better, mentally healthier lives so you don't understand what it is like to walk in my shoes.
Quite simply put, it is important to me that I use my experiences to help others.
I am not a victim, I am a post traumatic stress disorder survivor and have experienced enormous growth post trauma. My story is a hugely positive one and so much good to come out of my experiences.
I strive to influence, motivate, educate and inspire people to prevent them going through, what I have, and continue to go through. I am vulnerable, I am raw.
I detail my journey from being a mentally healthy member of Victoria Police to my life turning point on 8 April 2003, when I attended my triggering incident.
Literally in the blink of an eye, the course of my life was changed. I only looked at the deceased male for all of .33 of a second, the blink of an eye, but that was enough to seriously injure me, without spilling a single drop of blood.
I failed to recognise the signs and symptoms of PTSD, depression and anxiety. I fell into a very dark world which culminated in 2013, when I was admitted to a psychiatric clinic for nearly two weeks.
I talk of my recovery to who I am today, a functioning person who strives to inspire, persuade and lead others that are living their own mental health journey. To give those that cannot see the light, light, and those that do not have a voice, a voice.
I will never be the same person that I was. I know that and have accepted that. You simply cannot "unsee" what you have seen and undo the psychological damage that was caused.
I fully respect and validate those who do not want to speak of their mental health journey. It is not for everyone as it is an extremely personal matter.
I still have so much more work on myself to do though. My self-confidence is low, my concentration is poor and my memory is severely lacking due to the trauma that my brain has suffered. Recovering from PTSD is not a weekend event, it is a lifetime event.
Despite still having plenty to work on, I am grateful for my experiences as I have been exposed to some incredibly strong, resilient, internally powerful and intelligent people. I now call these people friends which has enabled me to gain some incredible life skills.
What I am though is incredibly more aware of who I am and what I must do to keep myself on the upwards trajectory in mental wellbeing.
I simply need to use my journey and experiences to help inspire others, it is that simple. I am lucky to be equipped with this inbuilt attitude and I need to shine a light for others to see again.
I have an ability to tell my story, to be an inspirational speaker, be that in a corporate setting as the keynote speaker or in a more low-key intimate setting.
My story is far from over, there is so much positive work ahead, it’s an exciting journey.
Mark.
#BeWell
